October 8, 2009
Proper love
Song of Solomon 1
Jonathan Pokluda
Central Truth
A relationship built on a love for Jesus is one worthy of praise by all.
Key Verse | Song of Solomon 1:4
We rejoice and delight in you;
we will praise your love more than wine.
(Song of Songs 1:4b)
Song of Solomon 1
1 The Song of Songs, which is Solomon's.
The Bride Confesses Her Love
She 1 1:2 The translators have added speaker identifications based on the gender and number of the Hebrew words
2
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth!
For your love is better than wine;
3
your anointing oils are fragrant;
your name is oil poured out;
therefore virgins love you.
4
Draw me after you; let us run.
The king has brought me into his chambers.
Others
We will exult and rejoice in you;
we will extol your love more than wine;
rightly do they love you.
She
5
I am very dark, but lovely,
O daughters of Jerusalem,
like the tents of Kedar,
like the curtains of Solomon.
6
Do not gaze at me because I am dark,
because the sun has looked upon me.
My mother's sons were angry with me;
they made me keeper of the vineyards,
but my own vineyard I have not kept!
7
Tell me, you whom my soul loves,
where you pasture your flock,
where you make it lie down at noon;
for why should I be like one who veils herself
beside the flocks of your companions?
Solomon and His Bride Delight in Each Other
He
8
If you do not know,
O most beautiful among women,
follow in the tracks of the flock,
and pasture your young goats
beside the shepherds' tents.
9
I compare you, my love,
to a mare among Pharaoh's chariots.
10
Your cheeks are lovely with ornaments,
your neck with strings of jewels.
Others
11
We will make for you
2
1:11
The Hebrew for you is feminine singular
ornaments of gold,
studded with silver.
She
12
While the king was on his couch,
my nard gave forth its fragrance.
13
My beloved is to me a sachet of myrrh
that lies between my breasts.
14
My beloved is to me a cluster of henna blossoms
in the vineyards of Engedi.
He
15
Behold, you are beautiful, my love;
behold, you are beautiful;
your eyes are doves.
She
16
Behold, you are beautiful, my beloved, truly delightful.
Our couch is green;
17
the beams of our house are cedar;
our rafters are pine.
Dive Deeper | Song of Solomon 1
As I read this passage, I can't help but hear Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get it On” playing in my head. This Scripture is clearly marked by a STRONG mutual sexual desire between the Lover and his Beloved. A little more subtle in the passage is the strong restraint demonstrated by both.
The friends of the two lovers are able to celebrate their feelings towards one another. The passage says the couple's love for one another is worthy of praise by their friends.
In a time when the majority of marriages fail, I believe this period before marriage is something most people get dramatically wrong. My job allows me to observe closely people who are searching for a spouse. I have found that many have put this restraint as a second priority to their desire for one another. In addition, "buy-in" from their community is not as important to some as it is to those in this Scripture.
I am absolutely convinced that most successful marriages start with restraint and discipline taken before the wedding day. Many people with whom I meet have limited their ability for success by polluting their minds with memories of giving into their desires for sex through pornography. They have created expectations that their spouses will not be able to meet. Too often, unnecessary frustration is a future certainty for many relationships unless necessary healing takes place. It is never too late to seek healing.
When looking for a spouse or considering how to treat a spouse, we need to look to God and our community. Most people are very reluctant to allow others to speak into this process. It is extremely important that Christian relationships are built on a pursuit of Christ by each partner. When this is the case, God gives us everything we need to restrain our desires until His perfect timing, setting us up for marriage success. This also allows those with whom we share life to celebrate our relationship, knowing it brings honor to God. A relationship built on the pursuit of Jesus is worthy of praise by all!
Discussion Questions
1. How have I resisted allowing others to speak into my relationship with my spouse or potential spouse?
2. What in my past do I need to seek healing from, so that I can have a successful, God-honoring relationship?
3. What does proper pursuit of a spouse or potential spouse look like?